This hospital bed seems like your actual home now. We sit in silence instead of sharing nostalgic moments. Your eyes fixed on the wall, and you’re heavily sedated. Are you thinking about death? Or is it just the medication?
Because I don’t know you anymore.
You say goodbye to your son and tell him that he makes you proud. That’s the least you can do ‘cause you never told him this out loud in the past five years when he came to visit every day. But I think we all share some blame. I really hope one day you’ll get to walk away from here. One day you’ll be okay, but I hope you will remember me.
(Because I will remember you)
The pain is too great to deal with and you lie awake most of your nights. Is it comforting to say of me that we’re both dying inside? I didn’t always come up to your every expectation, the only grandson carrying your name, a crumbling foundation.
This bloodline will end with me.
Lately things are moving way too fast . In three months you got from safe at home to almost dead in this hospital. I can’t wrap my head around the idea that each weekly visit could be my last.
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